The Olympics is over. I had Olympic fever. I freely admit that I watched everything Olympic. When nothing was on except two countries (not USA) playing soccer, I would look for other games. Once we found something called “Dods” aka “death diving.” It is a sport from Norway where people jump off a really tall platform in weird positions, like running man. The points are given partly based on whether they “stick” the landing, which means going in with hands and feet first, like a sitting position with your butt in the air. It was remarkably fun to watch. It was like the skateboarding or ninja warrior type of sport. But I digress….back to the Olympics.
I saw table tennis, rock climbing, marathons, sprints, gymnastics, water polo (way too much of water polo, even a little is a lot), and even synchronized swimming which looks like aliens from under the water. We watched steeplechase, cycling, skateboarding (not much), three person basketball, wrestling (even less), and baseball/softball. It was to the point where Chester and I would go for a walk and I envisioned Olympic events everywhere. So I decided on some sports that our neighborhood and friend dogs would excel at. This seriously will be a thing, just wait.
Synchronized barking: The two Great Danes have the gold in this one. They were standing next to each other barking in tandem. Their mouths moved at the SAME TIME. Incredible!
Composure in the face of craziness: Norman the basset hound is the calmest dog ever. Chester was jumping around trying to get Norman to play. Norman was pretty stoic so Chester jumped over him. Norman didn’t seem to care! Amazing!
Pee Putting: like shot putting but through the fence and extra points for hitting another dog. Chester and Benson take turns peeing in each others yard through the fence. Sometimes they pee on each other. Who makes it the furthest? That’s why they need judges! Macy, Chester’s girlfriend on the other fence, tries to participate but is at a disadvantage.
Most Drool: need I describe this one? I had a turkey sandwich and not only did Chester drool while I was eating it, but after I was done he went outside and continued the drool. He is a contender but I don’t know, I’ve seen St. Bernards…I used to clean the cages at the Humane Society and we had a St. Bernard who would shake his head and drool would fly everywhere. Luckily he got adopted very quickly!
The sprint to the squirrel (no need to explain).
The fools gold; he and Enzo are champs. Then there is the most ferocious bark with a top-notch performance by the little white tornado down the street. Chester would also excel at hearing a cheese stick wrapper at a mile away, throw pillow wrestling, and barking at something he thought he might have dreamed about. He could lick the most water off the deck, too. Such a hound!
When Chester does something really hound-like, my husband says “you can take the dog out of the city but you can’t take the city out of the dog.” Chester is a city dog and we often remind him that he was living on the mean streets of Cleveland and had to eat garbage instead of milk bones (aka biscuits). He should not destroy throw pillows when he should be grateful he has them. Homeless doggies in Cleveland would love those throw pillows. We don’t actually know that any of that is true, but he did end up in the kennel, so I’m going to guilt him if I can. He doesn’t understand anyway, just looks at me like, “did you say biscuit?”
Chester and I went for a walk in the park. These little pop-em things are bursting. He would sniff the grass and I would pop some of them. When you touch them, they explode and the seed falls to the ground. I expect naturalists hate them because they do overtake everything. Like Tribbles. But they’re fun!
I also took a picture of Chester looking at Lake Erie. It was loud and the waves were sizeable. Lake Erie is the shallowest of the great lakes and storms can pop up quickly. I could not get a good picture to save my life, so here it is.
Speaking of pop, do you say pop or soda? Our kids said pop until they moved to Brooklyn, NY. Now they are all in on soda and kind of superior about it. Bah humbug. I’m going to get a pop and sit on the deck.
PS: Happy Anniversary to my husband. 40 years of shenanigans! Looking forward to the next adventure!